took a test

I took my first test today in class. I haven't taken a test in 8 years or so. I really dread taking tests. I get all nervous and start to hyperventilate. This test wasn't that hard, but I already know I missed 2 questions. What a bummer! I knew what Apgar does, but I had no idea what are 4 things that you test for in Apgar, so I just made up 4 things. I got 1 out of the 4 correct. There are actually 5 things you test, but we only had to name 4. Ah, just read in Wikipedia that it was named after Virginia Apgar, but then "they" came up with an acronym for it. I know I like to harp on things when I make a mistake. If I stayed longer, I don't think I could have figured it out.

On on Valentine's...I think it is quite silly. The whole thing of buying flowers or going out to a special dinner on Valentine's because it is dictated by a date on calendar. I saw so many guys with flowers in their hand on the night of Valentine's. It seems so unnatural. I guess it goes the same for Christmas as well? The whole idea of doing it out of obligation. I know not everyone does it out of obligation, maybe tradition? I guess sometimes traditions becomes obligations? Then it takes the fun out of it all.

insensitive me

Hard to believe that Luke actually reads my blog semi-regularly. I'm not very good about adding entries. He commented again last night that I haven't had any blog entries and I said, "Nothing exciting has happened." Actually, lots of newsworthy/blogworthy events have happened.

• Luke and I celebrated our 1 year dating anniversary on 2/13(Luke remembered and got 3 items from the 3 places we visited on our first date)
  
• first time for both of us to have a Valentine on Valentine's (i'll say more on valentine's later)
  
• found out that indoor mildew can cause permanent damage to your lungs (yes, our apartment has been infested with indoor mildew on our living room walls for months, thankfully, I don't a fatal lung disease, but time will tell)
  

I got a contractor to come and look at the mildew today(actually expecting them in a few minutes). If it's dry rot, then we might have to move out. It can take 1 week or 1 month.

Comment on Valentine's shortly.

giving up your seat

I woke up late(again:)) this morning and took BART instead of walking to casual carpool. Here's another link to casual carpool http://www.sfride.com/. I'll have to share stories about casual carpool another time. I love casual carpool! Good exercise and it saves me significant amount of money. I just have to get up earlier. It's the goal I set every night, but it never seems to work in the morning:(.

This morning on BART, it was crowded as usual. I saw a pregnant woman get on the train. I'm guessing she was at least 8 or 8.5 months pregnant. Actually, I'm not good at guessing how many months a woman is in her gestation period, but she was obviously pregnant, so I gave up my seat. She was really grateful and she said I was unique. I didn't know what to say, so I chuckled uncomfortably. I felt sad and disturbed to hear that. I guess we don't give up our seats so easily anymore. Everything is mine, mine, mine. I'm guilty of that as well. I do that when I'm driving. Well, good karma returned. Someone got up and left a seat open, this guy next to me was much closer to the seat, so I didn't bother to fight for the open seat, so I kept reading my magazine. The guy tapped me and offered the seat to me instead of jumping at the chance to sit down. I was thankful. Lesson reminder, be kind and courteous even if kindness will not be returned immediately or returned at all. Be kind for the sake of being kind.

airborne

I woke up this morning with a terrible sore throat and phlegm. I know nastiness :). I took 2 Airborne throughout the day and I'm feeling better already. This stuff works, I tell ya! I drank lots of hot water through out the day as well to flush out my system. I start training Saturday (2/18) for Anchorage, so don't want to be sick. I skipped swimming today. Depending on how I feel tomorrow morning, I may go to yoga instead or running. I'm still working on my downward facing dog. My body does feel great after yoga class. I plan on sticking with it at least twice a week.

Yesterday, Luke and I went to Half Moon Bay Francis Beach. It was cold! But beautiful! Unfortunately, I forgot my camera, so no pictures of the beach:(. We also went to the Half Moon Bay Nusery. The nusery has all sorts of fruit trees, tropical plants, and tons and tons of flowers. Luke bought a whole bunch of flowers and will be starting his own green house:). There is something exciting and obviously nurturing about taking care of plants. I'm too lazy with plants. My pine tree seedling is not doing so well at home. It's like Charlie Brown's Christmas tree. When you touch it, the needles all fall to the ground.

cross-country skiing

I tried out cross-country skiing this weekend. I don't like going fast. I don't like going down-hill neither on a bike or skis. I've tried both and didn't like them at all. I enjoy a slow steady pace. I didn't have my digital camera, so no photos from my trip. I had this really old expired film underwater camera. I didn't know how well they would turn out, so I didn't ask Costco to put them on a CD. Some photos turned out better than I expected.

Family...I'm having a hard time emotionally with my mom again. After meeting Luke she has not made any effort to call. She will be visiting at the end of March, but I will not see my parents since they will be staying down in San Jose and coming and leaving during the week. I get the sense she is avoiding me. I know a great feeling to have with my parents. Once I again I feel hurt and rejected. I don't think it has to do with Luke. It's more that she is incapable of showing any type of support. Things that come out of her mouth are usually criticisms. I think that's the Asian way. They hold true to negative reinforcment. It's ingrained in their blood, their upbringing. It really stinks living in this bi-cultural world. In one sense, I appreciate some of my upbringing, in other ways, it really stinks to feel schezonphrenic. I have to act and expect things to be certain way for certain situations, but somethine else in another. I think this will be an undying battle between my mom and me. I know in western culture, I can say forget this, but the ties are strong and I can't easily do that. I'm not sure what to do. My Mandarin abilities are limited, so I can't really express what I want to say in a normal adult conversation. It's good to vent and reflect on a blog.

books and wealth

I finished The Namesake the other night. I actually stayed up late, until 12:15am to finish. The Bengladeshi culture is quite similar to the Chinese culture. I think most non-Western cultures share many similarities.
Similarities:
-concept of personal space, time
-children living with their parents until they are married, despite their age
-children sharing the same room with their parents despite their age, due to the lack of space and probably the lack of need or desire for privacy
-friends/relatives stay in your homes when visiting instead of staying at a close by hotel/motel, to save money and again really no need for privacy
-long mournings for parents who have passed on, they can last for a week up to a month, very non-western indeed, we get 1 day off from work here in the States
-family/relatives really get into your personal lives
-clean your plate, due to the lack of food and money to spend on food
-family, family, family

Maybe it's not just non-Western culture, maybe it's more of a non-American culture thing. I've only experienced the Chinese, Chinese-American, and American culture, so that's what I can compare with. Living in America, I know I've come to expect certain rights, freedoms, choices, my own space, my own time, etc. Bottom line I'm spoiled and I get irritated when things don't go my way. I want to learn to let go, not to the extreme, but appreciate what I have. Living in America is a real privilege and I can't/shouldn't complain. Check out how rich we are: http://www.globalrichlist.com/.